DAMNITOL Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.
EMPTYNESTROGEN Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out!
ST. MOMMA'S WORT Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.
PEPTO-BIMBO Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.
DUMBEROL When taken with Pepto-Bimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks. -"BB"-
"I'd rather die while I'm living than live while I'm dead." "Some of it's magic, and some of it's tragic, but I've had a good life all the way."
VIAG-HER: When taken 30 minutes before sex, you'll think he's as good as he thinks he is.
MORNING AFTER PILL: Will induce amnesia when the VIAG-HER doesn't work so at least you can forget how lousy he really was.
FYI, country music and pick-up trucks does not equal stupidity. My hubby plays the first on his steel guitar and drives the second. Gender aside, I can't play but I can drive that truck.
I'm a Finhead Guy Finatic! Real Parrotheads Ride the Pole! I Triple Dog Dare Ya!
